The best defense, in my experience, is a sense of humor – and no one has a quicker comeback than a man in a dress and a 4 foot wig. If you ever want to catch an example of throwing shade, turn on any reality show with judges and watch the commentary, or do what I do – go to Gay Bingo, and see what they come up with, it’s usually hilarious.
The secret to ‘shade’ is to be smarter, faster, funnier – get to the ‘pain’ of the insult as quickly as you can – not unlike when you bake a cake and you put a knife into the center to see if it’s done? If the knife comes out clean, no batter on it, cake is ready – shade is the same, you don’t want crumbs when you pull out. (That is true for so MANY things in life, N’cest Pas?)